Dec 292012

Yes I do not know who I am sleeping and my breathing in and out with sand flowing from my fingers and toes into the air like the incense I like the smell of after benediction and the footsteps that take me into the ocean that absorbs all sound when my feet find the wet sand sinking through my toes with the pull of the sea not cold but the coolness of this vastness rippling around my thighs lapping against my maidenhead and goosebumps expecting what revelation will come with this breath sounds somewhere in and around me oh yes

Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

after dark –
the glossolalia
of the sea

yes I am the Samaritan lady at the well with the middle eastern sun and sand the man asks me to draw water for him his eyes not undressing me like men do since I began to shape into a woman but he yes he sees me and asks me yes for water yet he asks me to see who he is that I if I ask he will give me living water and I am not just a sinner but a creature in a desert thirsting and this man is offering me water that will never stop like a spring welling up like this quickening that loosens in me yes

Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

autumn night
unfolding before my eyes
from nothing

but God is silent existing only in an unapproachable light on the other side of all that is outside of the vastness of space and the billion upon billions of years of time when change first began the way my heart burns within me and the quickening I feel like it must feel to have a baby growing inside my womb if I put frangipani flowers in my hair or jasmine like the other girls and wear a pretty yes and welcome his kiss in a shady grove and I am wanting him more than any other and then I ask him with my eyes to find me and yes he would seek and yes I would

Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

frogpond –
the forgotten silence
of tadpoles

closer to me than I am myself filling my innermost self knowing my weaknesses and aches in ways that are too big for me to grasp for when I think I know it flits by yes he is in all I know from the light of stars long long gone to the edge of swelling space from the seed of my birth to the void of my death in every fold of my body every beat of my heart every stirring of my mind and yes again parting the petals of my lips and yes my light my arms around and yes drawing him down to my breasts all yielding yes

Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

in the wind
what might have been …
sleepless moon

yes the emptiness not even lightning can illuminate parts for me and I hear breathing as of some long forgotten coupling while a dark wind broods with warm breast and with yes bright wings

first light …
for a moment all colour
is this

First published in Simply Haiku Summer 2011

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